Longing for Love Day 4; Fear Not

Saturday, July 25, 2015

Women are very vulnerable creatures. We're alluring, inviting, and tender. We symbolize God's heart. 

A woman longs for a feeling of security, a place where she knows she is safe; a place where there is no risk of being harmed. She longs for words of assurance, validation, and love. She longs to be delighted in, longed for, pursued, and cherished. She longs to be loved and to love, and she longs for Her little girl dreams to come true. The desires, even as a child, are still a part of the woman's heart because she was born into this world asking the same question as an adult.

As the years go by and the wounds grow deeper, our desires, vulnerability, and feminine hearts are buried beneath a woman just trying to survive. 


Maybe we were rejected. Maybe someone never spoke life into us, words of love and assurance and security that every heart longs to hear. Maybe life came hard and being vulnerable means letting go of your control, allowing your heart to be wide open. 

There could be a million different reasons, but the bottom line is something didn't go right. Someone failed us and life got hard. We then think that being vulnerable, simply being a woman, means we are weak. We subject ourselves to the lies that we do not have what it takes to fight against this world and its attacks. So, in order to regain a control that we think we do not have, we become demanding, controlling creatures longing for a sense of security. We take matters and problems into our own hands thinking, making our heart take a breath and convincing it that we can have things under control. We are safe. We are secure. We hide our hearts, afraid they will just be broken again. We hide our desires, our interests, our beauty, our longings in hope that we will not be vulnerable, we not will be unsafe.


The reality is this: You do not protect your heart by pretending you don't have one. In The Fault in our Stars by John Green, the movie states, "Pain demands to be felt." Pain does not demand to be hidden or pushed away. Pain demands to be felt. Pain demands the risk and the turns of giving your heart away. Women are emotional, relational people and pretending that we do not have any emotions at all is rejecting the reality of life. If we continue to allow ourselves to hide, our hearts will only continue to harden and  become wounded. Our hearts are not only made for love, but our hearts are made for pain. That is how the Father mends, that is how beautiful things are created. He tells us to guard our hearts, for everything that we do flows from it(Psalm 4:23). We are not told to carelessly toss our hearts around and openly share it with others who will only abuse it. Our hearts are precious, the most beautiful of all God's creation. We are called not to hide it, but to protect it. Our Father commands us to love. And that, my friends, means taking chances and to stop hiding. It means risking our hearts at the price of love, but not giving it away with no intention.



Instead of hiding, some women go about the route of demanding control and having order over everything. Knowing we are in "control," allows our hearts to feel a little more content and secure. And isn't that a breather to a woman's heart? We refuse to give God control, afraid that it will only leave us hurt and wounded and vulnerable yet again. Jesus promises that He works all things together for our good (Romans 8:28). Ladies, He has good plans for us. We know that the control of man only leaves us out of control. Yet we continue to struggle with letting go of the reigns on our life. We struggle with God's will against our own. We must live in the truth of the fact that the way of the Lord is much higher than our way of living, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts (Isaiah 55:8). His plans are not always our plans, but they are always better, always beautiful.


As of lately, Jesus has gently reminded my frantic heart that my security rests not in my circumstances, but in His arms. This is because recently, I had to let go of a chapter of my life that I was comfortable with and secure about. After I let go, life suddenly felt uncertain, unsafe, and I became insecure as a result. I wish I could have fell secure and safe during this chapter of my life, but after some very long and painful days, the Lord reminded me that life changes. Seasons come and seasons pass. Chapters are closed and new ones are written. Life is an adventure that is inconstant and unpredictable. Yet, through the craziness of it all, this one thing will always remain true: Jesus truly is our firm foundation. He is our hiding place, our place of refuge and safety. We are secure in His love and in His promises. Life may be unstable, but Jesus it not. He is the same yesterday, tomorrow, and forever. This world will fail you. Your security in earthly things will never last. But your security in Jesus Christ, that's eternal. Forever. And that's something we can always stand on.

So, ladies, I encourage you. I know your broken heart is crying out, and I know you're  afraid. I know you're hurting. But what I also know is that Jesus has overcome it all (John 16:33); that His perfect Love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18); that, as we delight ourselves in Him, first and foremost, He will give us the desires of our hearts. (Psalm 37:4); I know that He does not cause pain without allowing something new to be born. (Isaiah 66:9); that all things are made beautiful in His time, not ours. (Ecclesiastes 3:11); that He longs to be loved by us; that He longs for your heart, every piece of it. He longs for the imperfections, the late nights, the broken heart, the tired eyes, the mundane, the craziness, the broken, the painful. He desires intimacy with you- not the you you wish you were, and not the you you are striving to become. Just you. The realest, the truest, and the most vulnerable you. 


You can trust Him, beautiful one. Oh you can trust Him.

Let's slowly put down our walls. Let us release the control, the hiding, and the hurt into the arms of the Father that will never let you go. Let us drop our defenses and our broken hearts at the foot of the Cross, and run to Him with open arms. Let us experience His perfect love, forgiveness, grace, and His heart. Let us experience divine intimacy with the One who understands your heart. And let us embrace the heart of a woman' the heart that is vulnerable, feminine, alluring, inviting, and everything God created it to be. 


May we reflect the image of God in the way we were designed and our defenses as we open our hearts. May we love and receive love in return. And may we passionately embrace everything that there is to being a woman.

{photo: @lulubeeisme}



About the Author

Addy is the founder of Godly Relationships, a ministry focused on directing young women to the Cross, the arms of Jesus. Godly Relationships exists as a place to encourage young women to passionately chase after the heart of God, and to trust Him with every aspect of their lives. Godly Relationships longs to help girls fully understand that God is writing their love story, and that His plans are good, and pleasing, and perfect. You can find Godly Relationships on Instagram here & Twitter here. Click here to discover the blog site for this ministry.

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