When Surrender Hurts: Trusting Jesus with My Daughter
I never imagined this would be our story.
Watching my daughter live with chronic illness has been the most painful, soul-stretching experience of my life.
You think: Surely she’ll get better. Surely this isn’t forever.
But the last four years have felt like one long unraveling.
Surrendering her to Jesus has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And I’ve had to do it every single day.
There’s a deep ache when the life you imagined for your child disappears.
Dreams fade. Health declines. Plans fall apart.
You grieve not just what is, but what may never be.
Surrender Isn’t Giving Up—It’s Giving Over
Surrender is not throwing in the towel; it’s opening my hands to Christ in trust.
It’s the daily act of whispering:
“Jesus, You love her more than I do. I trust You—even here.”
Some days that trust looks like tears in the car.
Some days it’s only one word: Help.
But He hears every cry and holds every tear.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” — Philippians 4:6 (ESV)
True peace isn’t the absence of suffering or the guarantee of healing.
Peace is the gift of Christ’s presence—grace enough for today.
Joy in the Midst of Tears
And even here, there can be joy.
Not loud joy, but sacred joy—the kind that rises slowly in suffering and whispers:
“You are not alone. He is near.”
To the mom walking this road too:
You are not weak. You are loving faithfully through the hardest kind of battle.
Your surrender is not weakness—it is worship.
“Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy!”
— Psalm 126:5 (ESV)
Sometimes joy is the song that begins even while the tears are still falling.
A Simple Prayer for the Weary Mom
Lord, I lay her before You again. I trust You with the ache, the waiting, the unknown. Give me grace for today—and let joy grow,
even here. Amen.
Closing Encouragement
God does not promise us a life without suffering, but He does promise His nearness to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18) and that His grace is sufficient for our weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Every surrender is another step of faith—an act of worship that acknowledges His sovereignty and goodness even in the valley.
Meet the Author
Amy Bunting
Amy is a sinner saved by grace, learning to live with joy even when life is hard. She’s been married to Bradley for nearly 25 years and is the mother of four — with one still (barely) in the nest.
Her family has walked through deep valleys, including her daughter’s chronic illness. Through it all, Amy has come to know the peace and faithfulness of Jesus in a deeply personal way as she learns to surrender.
She writes to offer the same hope and encouragement she’s received — quiet reminders that we are not alone, and that God is still good.
When she’s not writing, Amy teaches second grade! She hopes her students catch a glimpse of Jesus as she helps them to feel seen and loved.
Connect with her on Instagram here.
