Your Identity Is Not Lost in Motherhood: It Is Being Made New in Christ
Everything changed when I stopped viewing motherhood as something that made me “lose myself” and started seeing it as my greatest opportunity to become more like Jesus.
Becoming a mom does not just change your circumstances. It changes you. Physically, mentally, emotionally. The person you used to be may feel gone in many ways. Giving up the life you once knew for the sake of new life requires sacrifice. Jesus knows what that is like better than anyone.
Jesus laid down His life so that others could live. Motherhood reflects this same daily posture of self-giving love.
The Gospel in the Work of a Mother
Motherhood is a daily embodiment of Jesus’ words in John 15:13: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life...” (NIV).
Every diaper changed.
Every sleepless night.
Every meal prepared.
Every prayer whispered over tiny hearts.
This is holy work. It is the slow and often unseen shaping of a Christlike heart.
Grieving Who You Were Is Normal, But It Should Not Define You
It is normal to grieve the woman you were before becoming a mom. But our longing for our former selves can easily become an idol when we allow it to steal our focus from the present life God has called us to lead.
The Bible does not ask us to ignore our feelings, but it does call us to view them through the lens of truth.
James 1 reminds us to “consider it pure joy” when we face trials, because these very challenges are producing perseverance in us. God is forming maturity in us, making us “complete, not lacking anything.” (James 1:2-4, NIV)
Motherhood is not the thing that ruins us. It is one of the ways God finishes His good work in us.
Sanctification Happens in the Everyday Ordinary
As moms, we have the privilege to follow in Jesus' footsteps by laying down our life for the sake of others all day, every day, even without leaving the house.
With every act of service for your family, every sacrifice instead of selfishness, and joyful acceptance of God's blessings and callings in this season, we “put off our old self” and “put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” (Ephesians 4:22-23, NIV)
The world will tell you to hurry and “snap back” to your old self.
The enemy will whisper that you need to “find yourself again.”
But God is not calling you back. He is calling you forward.
God Is Not Trying to Give You Your Old Life Back
God’s best for you is not rediscovery and regression. It is refinement.
Not going backward. But being made new.
Psalm 16:11 reminds us that fullness of joy is found in the presence of God, not in who we used to be. When we parent from a place of rest in Him, we parent from abundance, not striving.
Motherhood Was God’s Idea
Motherhood was never meant to break you. It was always meant to shape you.
Your identity is not lost. It is being refined. It is being strengthened. It is being made more like Christ.
“I need to find myself!” < “What a gift that God uses motherhood to make us more like Him!”
Meet the Author
Lauren Carter
Lauren is a lifelong lover and follower of Jesus with a passion to point people to Him in all she does. Lauren lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband, their two boys, and new baby girl.
As a church women’s ministry leader turned stay-at-home-mom with a biblical studies degree, Lauren loves to encourage women to walk closely with the Lord and boldly in the ministries He’s given them - inside their own homes and beyond!
Connect with here on Instagram here.
